As you sit in your third, fourth, or fifth therapy session and you’re thinking this hour will never end, but you desperately want to feel better? Are you feeling like they have forgotten everything you’ve said so far in sessions?
While there are a lot of therapists offering their services, finding the perfect therapist for you, especially if you have never seen a therapist before, may take a little time and effort. So, what gives you the best chance of finding your perfect therapist?
Here are some of the most important issues you should consider:
- Is the therapist licensed in your state?
- Does the therapist take your health insurance? In-network? What are your costs?
It is pretty easy these days to find a therapist, but is it the perfect therapist for you? There are some additional things to think about, whether you have an amazing referral from a trusted person or found them in an online directory.
- Do they specialize in your concerns? (i.e., depression, anxiety, work stress, couples, discrimination, family relationships, etc.)
- Do they prefer working with children, teens, adults, seniors, couples, or families?
- What are your preferences? Someone who is your gender, similar in age, ethnicity, or lived experience or something different?
- Do you prefer in-person or virtual? Is it hard to get out of the office? Or are family members invading your quiet space?
- Do you prefer a style – conversational, directive with solutions, upbeat and focused on your strengths, or a quiet listener?
- Did you get the best results in a specific type of therapy in the past – CBT, DBT, solution-focused, trauma informed, or EMDR, etc.?
The best way to find out if a therapist has potential to be a great fit for you is to contact the therapist – most offer 15-30 minute consultations.
Red Flag – if you reach out and get no response, keep looking.
Choosing a therapist is a very personal matter. It is all about the relationship. It is important that you feel a sense of trust that this therapist can help you. If you are sitting there wondering when the session will end, or if they will remember where you left off last time – it might feel a little awkward, let them know something isn’t working. I’ve had a few amazing therapists, some very competent therapists I didn’t feel a strong working relationship with, and a couple I broke up with without regret. It’s pretty similar to finding the perfect hair stylist!
In the end, therapists want the very best for you, and if we aren’t the right fit, we will help you find the right one for you.
Brenda Chase-Kotewa, LMHC 